Showing posts with label Mnstrm Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mnstrm Life. Show all posts

Saturday, May 21, 2011

yall excited 4 the RAPTURE!!!???

we've had some gr8 internet memes so far this year, yall
charlies sheen, rebecca black, donald trump, obama bin laden
in our overpopulated blog/youtube/internet meme economy
seems like a new meme cums & goes evry week
& i can barely keep track of them all
maybe i just don't have enough snark in me
2 become a 'prime-time' 'snarky meme blogger'
but since the rapture is literally 'just around the bend,'
i can't resist throwing in my '2 effing cents' sometimes, living in our godless urban cesspools of art, fashion, culture, and gay sex
it's easy 2 forget that there's 'a whole nother world out there, yall'
in middle america
populated by millions of overweight, unemployed white people [and mexicans]
with nothing better 2 do than watch satellite TV, monday night football, and Jersey Shore;
shop at the local Hot Topic or American Eagle;
eat Taco Bell;
and worship unicorns/the
'BIG GUY IN THE SKY' is it insensitive of the 'elitist, pretentious, educated, secular media sphere'
2 make fun of mnstrm americans snarfing down fast food & worshiping the one and only LORD JESUS CHRIST?
hells yeah it's insensitive!
he's already here, bb!
no wonder this guy thinks it's the end of the world
looks some1 dug him up from the grave & pulled a rake over him!
'it's the end of the world as we know it, yall, but i feel more 'mummy-like' than fine' -Harold Cambell

but SRSLY
why hasn't anyone realized that the 'end-of-the-world' gimmick
is just the greatest website advertising meme [via FAMILY RADIO]
of all time?
or was this just some stunt by R.E.M. 2 get youtube hits & try 2 be 'relevant' again?

these people don't look dangerous - - & maybe some miraculous day they actually will die out
& we can snark them left and right, up & down until they do

but they r a real threat to the well-being of democracy & social cooperation among the human race

truth is
religious fundamentalism doesn't help anyone
& only perpetuates social dissent, ignorance, poverty, & h8
they're welcome 2 their rapture
A new pride my ego taught me, and this I teach men: no longer to bury one's head in the sand of heavenly things, but to bear it freely, an earthly head, which creates a meaning for the earth. A new will I teach men: to will this way which man has walked blindly, and to affirm it, and no longer to sneak away from it like the sick and decaying.
-Zarathustra, [via FRIEDRICH EFFING NIETZSCHE]


keep on dancin til the world ends, yall!!! [damn, brit, ur lookin good, bb!]

*****

TOP 10 REASONS 2 CELEBRATE THE APOCALYPSE:
10. no more youtube vidoes like this!:

9. all gays can finally get married!
8. in the event of a world-wide earthquake, a great chance to thrash some sick, tsunami-style waVVes!
7. more time 4 blogging!
6. mad max will b there!
6. wont have 2 repay student loans!
6. 200 million less Xtians = more space for pagan sex orgies, yall!
3. can use all the empty churches for acid raves!
2. pigs wearing green boots!
1. more time 2 chill down with my chill, crust-punk dad!

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
how are u celebrating the RAPTURE?
do u listen to THE FAMILY RADIOS DOT COM?
will u be burning in [hell][heaven][other]?
does brittney spears look 'smokin hot'?
what has been ur fav 'meme of the week' of 2k11?
do u like the SALEM 'dancing 2 the world ends' vid better than brittney's? [s00 dark, yall]
will ben affleck & bruce willis save us? or will elijah wood/lele zeblowski/morgan freeman hussein obama save us?

Monday, February 21, 2011

should radiohead retroactively win 'grammie of the year'?

radiohead
is a band
that 'can do no effing wrong'
& is generally considered
by the internet 2 b
'G-D's effing gift to man'
but does n e 1 actually 'like'
this music?
or do we DL this shit only
b/c the internet tells us to?
is listening to each new radiohead album
just an excuse for mnstrmers
2 feel more 'alt'
& an excuse for alts
2 feel 'even more alt'?
oh thom...
can't really tell if ur music is good
what the hell r u saying?
r u having a seizure?
i know i should like u
the internet tells me to
will u get a 8.5-9.6 on p4k?
ur so conceptual
i just wanna get conceptual with u
body spasms_lotus flower_reality
_<3_truth_feeling
_emotion_double rainbows_luv
just wanna sit naked in a dark room
get blazed & stoned on pills
& vibe out 2 thom's 'haunting voice'
want 2 transcend human existence
want 2 transcend mnstrm & indie
want 2 transcend the Internet
want 2 travel back in time
& give u a giant grammie award
i've already pre-ordered 6
of ur $269 newspaper vinyls
#1 radiohead fan
rlly
ur so much more buzzworthy
than arcade fires
oh thom...
how slowly we unfold
bloopity bleepity bleep
<3 u
just wanna 'get real'
we're all in this 2gthr
mnstrmrs & alts
save us thom
save us
lead us 2
alternative
salvation
<3

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
have u DL'ed 'The Kings of Leons' yet?
is radiohead 'good music'?
is radiohead 'pretentious conceptual bullshit'?
did u order the newspaper album?
do u like radiohead on ur own, or only b/c every1 else tells you to like them?
is thom yorke a 'total hunk' or a 'total freak'?
how long have u been a radiohead fan?
what's the best/worst/most accessible/least accessible radiohead album?
is radiohead better/worse than arcade fires?
have you ever done drugs while listening 2 radiohead & had a 'transcendent experience?'
is music even about music anymore, or is music just abt image/blogs/internet memes?
does this music vid make u wanna puke?:

Sunday, December 26, 2010

is middle america a drag?

Or: coming 2 terms w/ur mnstrm roots ovr the holidays: a meaningful essay
sometimes
when I spend
several months
in ____________ (relevant alt city)
i forget that there’s
‘a whole other world out there’
so i go home to ____________
(OH/WI/MN/MI/IN/etc. etc.)
to reconnect w/my family
& our middle american
MNSTRM roots
used to really resent
growning up in
small town suburbia
shopping @ walmart & american eagle
acting in community theater
playing video games in basements
driving my mom’s van
taking AP courses
wearing cargo shorts
eating cheeseburgers & meat products
& getting called a ‘fggt’ by the football team
always knew i was ‘different’
always knew i was destined for ‘bigger & better things’
'getting a useless liberal arts/design school degree'
‘studying abroad’
‘making art’
‘starting a buzzband’
‘working at a vegan cafĂ©’
‘selling weed’
or just ‘doing jack sh*t’
while exploiting my parents
to live in a $800 + apt
in one of america’s
‘cultural meccas’
but now that i’m
‘getting a lil older’
going home 4 the holidays
has taken on ‘a whole new meaning’
really starting 2 appreciate
how mnstrm i used 2 b
don’t think i ever realized
how ‘good i had it’

sure –
no1 here has heard
of ‘iPads’
most ppl actually believe
in some1 named ‘GOD’
& animal cruelty
is a sunday hobby
but it’s nice not 2
wake up @ 3 in the morning
b/c my neighbor is blasting 50 cent
through my paper-thin apt walls
it’s nice 2 walk through the woods
or 2 drive around town in
my parents’ ‘gas-guzzling SUV’
instead of getting groped
by some old latino man on the subway
it’s even nice 2 wear cargo shorts
& to get a slurpie
@ my local suburban mall
hot topic rlly does have nice merchandise
(thinking abt getting a diamond-studded choker)
most of all
i’m thankful 4 my mnstrm parents
4 raising me w/conservative, xtian values
even tho i turned out 2 b kind of a
‘godless, liberal, & depressive butt hole’
they still <3 me 4 who i am
(or at least who they wished i had become)
& buy me expensive material possessions

mom makes a rlly good ‘turduckin’
& dad is rlly good
@ watching TV

all in all
i’ve realized
if i hadn’t grown up
in MNSTRM america
i never would have succeeded so well
@ becoming a cynical, jackass ‘effing hipster’
living within the snug bubble of ‘alternative culture’

i know now
no matter how bad i F up
how much debt i accrue
how much dank i smoke
how much PBR i drink
how many graduate degrees i acquire
how many mp3s i download illegally
how many times i drop my iPod on the subway tracks
how many veggie burgers i consume
how many blog entries i write
how many relevant alt music festivals i attend
how many times i study abroad
how many jonathan franzen novels i read
how skinny my jeans are –
in short, no matter how alternative i become –
i know now
i’ll always b able 2 come back
to Middle America

i'll always be able
2 come back
to MNSTRM USA
my heart
my life
my home

_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
did u grow up in middle America?
do u h8/<3 going home 4 the holidays?
do u resent ur childhood?
do u wish u were raised by ‘AltParents’?
is ‘alternative culture’ overrated?
is alternative culture ‘killing our planet’?
is mnstrm American culture ‘killing our planet’?
have u come 2 terms w/ur mnstrm roots?
will u ‘burn out’ on alt city life in 1.5-3 years & move into ur parents' basement?
are there even such things as ‘alt’ & ‘mnstrm’?
does mnstrm = alt?
r the suburbs s000000 b0000ring?
is the arcade fires PRETENTIOUS EFFING BLLSHT?