what dyall do in cafes?

i am an authentic bro
sketching w/$20 colored pencils
in a 500-page leather bound sketchbook
sitting in a relevant café
in sitka
with a skuzzy beard
and fingerless gloves
that make me look ‘down to earth’/‘homeless’
but also wearing trendy thick-rimmed glasses
to suggest that I am still ‘intellectual’/‘thoughtful’/‘deep’
waiting for some hot broads
to ask me abt my ‘art’
i will flip through my sketchbook
to show them my meaningful drawings
that represent
my unique and insightful
perspective of the world
i grew up in the suburbs of middle america
north carolina
now i have shunned
my mnstrm suburban roots
come to alaska
to ‘get real’ abt life
and search 4 spiritual enlightenment
i am a fisherman/trailworker/wandering soul
becoming ‘one with nature’
turning my back on material things
sipping a $6 soy mocha chai spice vegan latte
and when I have learned all alaska has to teach
i will migrate
to williamsburg/portland/seattle/san fran
and live in an anarchist collective/freegan house/$2,000-a-month 1-bedroom apt.
to share my meaningful experiences
and my art
with other young and authentic spirits
this is my life, yall
sitka is MY town
just a pudgy beard bro
sitting in a relevant cafe
sketching in a 500-page leather bound sketchbook
w/$20 colored pencils


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what dyall do in cafes?
what is the most authentic/relevant cafe?
do u use colored pencils or water colors?
do u use a moleskine journal?
r u 'authentic crusty' or just 'aesthetically crusty'?